Pooped

Waking up before dawn is the worst feeling ever.  I'd rather stay up all night than crawl out from a warm cocoon of blankets feeling under slept and looking like a creature that resembles Gollum - only instead of being bald, I have terrible bed head.  I'm aware that I will have plenty pre-dawn wake-ups as a future doc... and I'll probably wake up exactly the same way: making creature-ish sounds like Gollum, clutching my cup of coffee and muttering, "Preeeeciousssss."

Anyway.  

I woke up at 5 am to take two buses up to Santa Rosa to train the new AmeriCorps girl - Bus #1 was subsequently late, but I ended up on Bus #2 just on time and got to watch the sun rise as it drove out of the San Fran fog.  Originally, I had planned to be there for a week to help her get settled in, but due to schedule conflicts up everyone's wazoos, we had to settle for a one-day massive data overload.  I feel bad in that she probably feels overwhelmed by the sheer amount of information I threw at her - things that took me weeks or months to learn (or months before I got around to learning it).  I felt so bad that I told her and my former boss to contact me anytime they needed info, at least until the new girl has time to process and absorb.  It will be a good chance for me to keep in touch too.  I hope she has a good year.  

We went to a restaurant called Mamma Pig's for pulled pork and bbq. YUM.  I was starving when I arrived, but it was so filling I only ate half.  Also, I discovered Leninade:

I have NO idea what flavor it was supposed to be, and I don't care =P
The words under the star says: "Join the party!"
Yes, comrade! 

Late Night Blogging Carried Over to Noon

I've been alternating between bouts of productivity and bouts of extreme layzee-itis.  I was watching a 2AM rerun of Without a Trace until I fell asleep, and I stayed up the previous night to marathon Battlestar Galactica like the geek I am.  My sleep schedule is preeeeeeeetty messed up.

I finished reading Healing of America recently.  Overall, I liked it.  The author, T.R. Reid is good at explaining the similarities and differences between different health care systems in North America, Europe and parts of Asia.  It's an easy read for someone who doesn't want to grapple with too much professional jargon or someone who wants an introduction into health policy.

I've also been e-mailing professors..My next step will be to set up an appointment with a few of them, which I won't be able to do until a month or so from now, once I'm out of my sling and can make the hour and a half drive to campus.  I was surprised that some of them responded to my e-mail within days...I was expecting to wait along the lines of a month or so, which is why I asked so far in advance.  Oops.

I've also been updating my end-of-the-year AmeriCorps report for Dr. J, the medical director at the surgery center.  The hard part is trying to be thorough without ending up with a 20-page report, which I can easily do since my quarterly reports were easily 10-11 pages each.

On Friday I'll be heading back to Santa Rosa to train the new AmeriCorps girl.  I'll have to get up at 6-ish (ahhhhhhh the horrorrrrrrrr!!!) to take the bus up, but I'm looking forward to hanging out with the staff again.  Hopefully some of the more fun dentists/docs are scheduled to work.

Replacement Found!

We finally found our replacement.  I feel like a tremendous weight has been lifted off my shoulders!  Now I can  return to my long to-do list without feeling this nagging anxiety that my agency will not have anyone to pick up where I left off.

It has been an interesting experience, to say the least.  At 24, I already felt a huge gap between me and the fresh graduates who turned down the offer with the phrase, "It's not a good fit for me."  Like me, many of them were able to spend their time volunteering and signing up for internships while living off their parents and thus, do not have a good grasp of Life yet.  The economic downturn that started before my graduation and this past year of making ends meet with my meager AmeriCorps paycheck has taught me never to turn down opportunity, especially if it coincides with the possibility of professional development.  Many of my co-workers, who are my age and understand the difficulties of making a living, echoed the same sentiments.  But I learned to acknowledge that some people have very specific goals for their health career that do not coincide with the job description and I realize that fresh graduates tend to have a lot of optimism that may or may not pay off later.  Maybe it's just my cynicism talking and I'm still feeling bitter about the anxiety my supervisor and I endured during the past two weeks.

I AM glad that my AmeriCorps position is going towards an individual who has worked hard to fund her own needs, from bills to her own education.  I'm also glad that because of her own background, she understands first hand the difficult lives of the people my agency serves.  Maybe it was meant to be.  Maybe she just needed someone to give her a chance so she can do something great that will amaze everyone.  I hope so.